these instructions must be followed to complete the piece.
if you choose to do so, please send any evidence of your performance to jaxxon_a@protonmail.com

the american dream

eat a 12" pizza while moaning


white cold drink

the creative exercise

-buy a small notepad of ~100 pages, and a mechanical pencil
-smoke weed
-sketch as much as you can before the high wears off
-repeat from step two if the notepad is incomplete

the barb

-bleach your hair
-dye it orange
-never go to the barber again

the toothbrush

-listen to new dawn fades by joy division while brushing your teeth
-gargle water for 30 seconds
-go to sleep

the ways in which to eat discobits biscuits for breakfast

-eat one discobits biscuit for breakfast every day for 30 consecutive days
-save each wrapper after consumption rather than throwing it out
-after 30 days inspect the wrappers and find purpose in your life


-wear as many red clothing items as you possibly can
-consume only red foods for one meal
-only listen to music with a red album cover
-only watch movies if they have a red promo poster
-bleach and dye all your hair red
-drink only red liquids
-become one with red
-embrace red